So what's the problem?

I feel lost, without identity or purpose. I want to teach (that to me means inspire. Inspire and impart knowledge onto others, pass on what I know and what to expect.) I love helping, guiding, inspiring, learning and making.
If I am going to teach what will I teach?
Am I an experts in anything?
Commercial, profitable and usable products are important to my creativity. I want to inspire by making creating and doing. Will there be any teaching in this MA?
problem-solving is my strength, so, the problem now is, the course is too broad and vague, with no brief at all.
Commercial teaching?
I have gone from being an expert, respected and enjoying my job to a lost student who can't understand or make a decision about my practice.

product design feels more comfortable, I have more ideas and outcome solutions. I feel I can push my boundaries within product design because I know the boundaries.

DESIGN:LAB has no boundaries, this for me, coupled with my tendancy to deviate off topic,' has resulted in a rabbit in head lights situation. 

My analogy currently for my MA journey would be 'transfiguration' from catapiller to butterfly. I am in the stage of 'death' - mourning the loss of the 'old' me and unsure of the path head for 'new' me.

During a meeting I had with Helen and Dave we discussed the option of a transfer from MA design lab onto MA product design. We all came to the conclusion that it's the right thing to me to do, throughout many meetings I have had with Helen and my tutor CJ, we have discussed that I was concerned with making commercially viable products and this was A consideration within my practice. Where this required justification on MA design lab, on product design it was a requirement.

During my time on design lab I was unsure as to how the collaborative elements of the degree would work, considering I was the only person on design lab. My fellow MA students were very supportive and really helped me with the decision-making process., in particular, Lauren Taylor was most upset at the thought of me leaving, she was equally going through a confusing time with the lack of direction and sense of being unsure, however she was confident that jewellery was the right direction for her. Her opinion mattered to me a lot and I was really unsure as to what to do.

Dave has put me in contact with pippi and daecan, who helped to arrange a lunchtime meet up with some of the product design students, over lunch we discussed what I missed, my reasons for wanting to move and my reasons for being on aN MA, this meal proided the fantastic solution to my confusion, talking to the product design students I felt on the same wavelength, things they were concerned with I was concerned with. Things I felt I was having to battle we're just common sense to them as well. In summary and on reflection it's potentially the difference between art and design.

how to decide?
On a collaborative degree without anyone to collaborate with this me became a genuine concern, within the group of 3-D design my fellow students are studying textiles, Jewelry, ceramics or interior design, however nobody else is on design lab.
Looking at the end goal of becoming a university lecturer, both degrees will get me to the same end goal.

Which will I enjoy or learn more on? the research journey for both courses Will potentially be the same. However, product design will give me more structure, more boundaries and the module on 3-D modelling would benefit me a lot if I don't end up teaching. if therefore my ambition does change and I recognise that lecturing may not be the end goal. having a product design MA will benefit me more with the 3-D modelling skills that come with it.

This is only becoming more of a consideration to me having recently had a conversation with my mentor around the Limited availability of lecturing roles. She had explained the quite lengthy process of getting into lecturing which requires going through part time lecturing before getting a full-time job. Having gone away and completed some basic research on Google I have found that, contrary to what I have started to believe, my experience in industry, rather than set me back, may actually help and set me apart.

in London, at Kingston Business School, an academic's industry-based teaching approach has led to Dr Deborah Anderson being awarded a prestigious National Teaching Fellowship from the Higher Education Academy:

"What I tried to get across in my written submission was how I hoped my students benefited from my experience as a practitioner as well as an academic," she said. "Marketing is such a fast-paced and quick-changing discipline that we really can't rely on textbooks any more - if we want our teaching to be as fresh and relevant as possible, we need the voice of the industry." (Kingston University lecturer’s industry-based approach to education earns National Teaching Fellowship award, no date)

So that's decision made! I'm making the move!